Brian sets his sights on a girl named Carolyn and follows Stewie's advice to take things slow with the relationship, only to drive her crazy and straight into Cleveland's arms. Brian does whatever it takes to win her back, even if it means getting Cleveland's ex-wife Loretta involved.

Peter gets a record for his favorite song "Surfin' Bird", a song so annoying that he drives everyone insane with it, prompting Brian and Stewie to destroy the record. Distraught, Peter goes to the record store for another copy and discovers Jesus disguised as the store clerk, and the two start hanging out.

Mort Goldman accidentally steps into Stewie's time machine and goes back in time, and Brian and Stewie follow to retrieve him. When they discover that they've ended up in 1939 Poland, Stewie, Brian and Mort must make a perilous journey to Nazi Germany to find their way back to the present.

Peter gets a lasting supply of gasoline for the year, so the family decides to use it to take a road trip to the Grand Canyon. They pack up and hit the road, but it takes them a while to realize that they had forgotten to bring Stewie with them; when they do, they must make an explosive trip back home.

When Brian gets injured during a take of Peter's version of Jackass, the Griffins realize that Brian may be getting too old, so Peter brings home a new dog, prompting Brian to leave. Everyone else, however, loves "New Brian"; all except for Stewie, who doesn't like his constant happy attitude.

Peter does everything he can to get a promotion at work, but he must first be sent back to repeat the third grade in order to qualify. Meanwhile, Frank Sinatra, Jr. returns to Quahog to buy the local nightclub with Brian and make it the hottest new spot in town, but Stewie has a few ideas of his own.

Bonnie finally gives birth to her baby, a beautiful girl named Susie, with whom Stewie falls in love and will do anything to win her heart. Meanwhile, Joe borrows $20,000 from a loan shark to pay for Bonnie's medical bills, and plans to steal the money from Mr. Pewterschmidt to pay off his debt.

Peter participates in some medical experiments to pay off his debt, including an experiment to see if the "gay gene" is a natural or learned trait. Peter winds up in a gay relationship and leaves Lois and the rest of the family heartbroken, though they realize the most important thing is that Peter is happy.

Peter cashes in a raffle ticket from 1989 and wins a golf outing with O. J. Simpson. When he befriends Simpson and brings him home to meet the family, the residents of Quahog aren't so welcoming of the infamous running back and try to force him out of town.

Lois lands a job at FOX News and has to shoot an investigative exposé on a liberal filmmaker, but loses her job when her story implicates a conservative radio host.

Furious he doesn't get to ask the cast of Star Trek: The Next Generation any questions at a convention, Stewie kidnaps the cast so they can hang out.

After Brian is arrested for drug possession, he launches a campaign to legalize marijuana. Mayor West passes the law, and the whole town goes to pot.

Stewie starts going to the gym with Peter after he gets beaten up by Joe's baby daughter Susie, but just when it seems that his hard work is paying off, Peter reveals that he's been giving him an anabolic steroid. Meanwhile, Chris begins dating a popular girl at school, only to see her popularity subside.

After drowning his sorrows when he learns his ex-girlfriend Jillian is getting married, Brian discovers that he has hooked up with The Hills star Lauren Conrad. Brian wants out of the relationship until he realizes that Conrad may be the perfect match for him, if only he is willing to let Jillian go.

After Peter discovers the writing of Stephen King, he imagines his family and friends in three of King's most famous works, including Stand by Me, Misery, and The Shawshank Redemption parodies.

Peter learns from a psychic through a palm reading that he had a fascinating past life in the 17th century as Griffin Peterson, a dignified English gentleman who vied for the love of Lady Redbush in the newly founded American colony of Quahog.